WWYD – health issues

Received this letter from a loyal reader….slightly edited to make it flow better.

Dear HSM

Please help me. This is a WWYD and I would love your readers’ insight.

I’ve got a suspected dodgy kidney but for various reasons I am keeping shtum about it. My mother called my sister in a panic yesterday because she was worried there was something seriously wrong with me – for no apparent reason. Despite Mum pumping her for info, my sister didn’t know anything. I ended up telling her because, well, she’s my sister!! Now my sister knows and my mother is still very worried about me, but I am still pretending everything is OK (I don’t want to worry her unnecessarily). WWYD? Do I tell my Mum? Is it right for me to encourage my sister to keep lying to our Mum? Should I just come clean and stop being so secretive?


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  1. Chav says:

    I would tell them the truth. If they didn’t know or suspect and you wanna keep it to yourself that’s ok. But now you have your sister knowing and your mom feels something wrong. It’s time to come clean with mom and explain to her that you didn’t want to worry her. But now that she’s worried you don’t want her suspecting the worst.

  2. It takes a lot of energy to keep a secret, energy that could be better spent. And when it is something so serious secrets destroy trust. Lehavdil, I know of a woman who didn’t tell her parents she was dying of breast cancer. They didn’t find out until afterward. I think she should let her mother share her pain and help, and set limits if necessary.

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