What is she teaching her kids?

I was just with my son at the local mall. I am very dressed down today – denim skirt, flip flops (sorry LT), casual tee, and a headscarf. (Similar to pic). The mall was busy. We walked past people of all types.

This mom and two pre-teen daughters walked very slowly past us, staring and pointing not at all unobtrusively at my head-covering. The mother loudly mentioned to her girls to “look at what that woman has on her head”.

I was flabbergasted. OK, I may look different from them – but to be so obvious in pointing it out? Even my youngest knows how rude this kind of behaviour is.

My son wanted to know why people cannot just accept others the way they are – aren’t we all people? What difference does it make if we look different or dress different, he asked? It gave us plenty to talk about – but I am so ticked off.

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  1. Zee says:

    Kind of a two way street isn’t it? You want them to just accept the way you are (which I agree they should) but in turn you have to accept that some people are just not accepting.

  2. Leah Sarah says:

    Before I stopped covering my hair, I overheard a table of women at my college talking about how I’m an Orthodox Jew and they know this because “only orthodox jews wear that kind of crap on their head” and other comments. Seriously, I was at the next table. I can hear you!

  3. Trip'n Mommy says:

    Come here! You’d be in the majority ;) And you should see what people wear here.. the more colors, patterns, times it wraps around your head, the bigger the bun in the back — the better!!

  4. Back a few years ago when we went through Sheitelgate (the whole Indian hair thing), I was at a table at some fundraiser with some women I know well, and we were discussing the issue. The woman sitting next to me said, “But people are leaving the house with a tichel on their heads! Can you imagine?!”

    As I have never owned nor worn a sheitel, and was sitting RIGHT NEXT HER still not wearing one… yeah, I can imagine.

  5. NechamaLeibowitz says:

    It takes all sorts of people to fill the world. Use her as a tool for teaching the lesson of how NOT to act in public :)

  6. N. Stalick says:

    It’s racist! And they know it is and they know u r Jewish and they knew u could hear them! We’re they white people? They could b supremisist! Really sad!

  7. S Apfel says:

    you will always find prejudice. Whether it is colour, race or covering your head. We teach our own children the importance of tolerance. Hopefully her children will one day realise that being different can make the world a colourful, vibrant and cohesive place, rather than being divisive.

  8. rachelli says:

    big lack of tact. she might not be against the headcovering, only voicing her opinion, but her lack of tact voicing her opinion in front of you was not nice . many many pple share this lack. can be very hurtful at times.

  9. Shoshanna says:

    I was on an airplane waiting to sit when a young girl asked her mother what I had on my head (black scarf tied in back) her mother very tactfully said- Its a scarf, isn’t it pretty? Thought that was great.

  10. shilohmuse says:

    I spent two awful years in London in the mid-1970′s being the only frum woman who wore a hat/scarf rather than wig. People looked right past me.

  11. Rebecca says:

    I was in a a store in a very religious neighborhood (I won’t say which one) and I was wearing a hat with a hat fall tied in a pony tail. The owner of the store who was helping me was very obviously staring at my head trying to figure out if that was my hair or a wig, so much so that she would stop several times mid sentence and just stare. Even my husband noticed. If I at all cared what random people thought of me, i would have been embarrassed for myself. I was more embarrassed that this was a fellow Jew.

  12. tesyaa says:

    You’d be surprised how many people think a scarf or wig automatically means you are undergoing chemotherapy. Maybe she thought you had health problems. It’s still ridiculously rude to point it out.

  13. Ha_Safran says:

    Just a reminder that “Dumb is everywhere”, dear.

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