We Have No Breasts in Monsey – The B-Word Post

We Have No Breasts in Monsey – The B-Word Post

By the looks of things I will have a whole alphabet of posts!

The B word. What word could I mean? What word immediately sprang into your mind?

Here in Monsey Ir HaKodesh the B-word is not allowed to be uttered. No. If you want to buy chicken breast or turkey breast you won’t find it labelled as such in some of the religious stores. It is in fact labelled as “Chicken Tops” or “Turkey Tops”. Yes, you can also buy chicken bottoms – although, by extension, should that not be a dirty word too? I have also seen “Turkey Tushies” – I kid you not. I shall have to take pictures next time I venture out to these stores that label their products in such a fashion.

I have since found out that there is an actual dog treat called “Chicken Tops” which has nothing to do with raw chicken breast. Interesting.

It’s not like your kid is sitting at the table asking you for “Chicken Boobies” or worse words used to describe breasts. No. It’s chicken breast, a part of the chicken – just like thigh, wing and leg. I fail to understand this obsession with not pronouncing certain words. Will we go to hell if we say “breast”?

I grew up in the UK, and we had white meat and dark meat when it came to chicken. If pushed we would have said chicken breast. Referring to the female anatomy, we would totally have said “boobs”. Just the way it was. But we never saw the word “breast” as something dirty or disgusting.

Human vs poultry – two very different things, not that it should matter.

I want to take my Sharpie to the store and write “BREASTS” on all packages of “Chicken Tops” and “Turkey Tops”. Who’s with me?

These words are only dirty if you make them so.

(Thanks AS for the title suggestion)

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  1. Dan says:

    Just ask for “supreme de poulet”….

  2. Batya says:

    Just don’t call it white meat in Hebrew or people will think you want ham.

  3. Daphne says:

    Compromise? Chicken tatas?

  4. S.A. says:

    *joining you with sharpie in hand*

  5. Chava A. Levin says:

    Yeah, and in Israel breast of chicken is chazeh off — which is literally the chest. A friend of mine went to the makolet and asked for shadayim shel off (chicken breasts) and absolutely horrified the guy she asked! But that’s a convention of the language, I believe, and logical, and not some chumratic shtus.

  6. Chava A. Levin says:

    Oh, and we used to call the tushie, “the Bishop’s portion”. I have no clue why. Don’t know if it was an LAism, or someone’s personal joke. My mother used to use them to make soup. So perhaps turkey tushies are available for that reason?

    • Naomi says:

      I have heard it called ‘Parson’s Nose’ – maybe that’s akin to the ‘Bishop’s Portion?’ seems comical. My grandpa called it the tail and he savored it.

  7. What is funny (not really) is that some publications in Israel won’t allow the word “hanaka,” breastfeeding. I’m still waiting for them to ban the word “tinok” as well.

  8. Arnie Samlan says:

    Maybe the O-U made them change the name…

  9. Melissa/Gana says:

    This is so dumb to me, honestly. My aunt (an evangelical christian) won’t say anything….she calls them “chicken up-fronters”, won’t say “cockpit” and won’t say sex, only the “married thing.” And she was in the medical profession and can’t say breast? Give me a break.

  10. are the breastlaver hasidim allowed in monsey?

  11. Lady Lock N Load says:

    The female chickens I buy wear Burkas. Kosher L’mehadrin. ;)

  12. Adina says:

    I dont think this is just a religious thing. Many people have issues using the correct terminology for body parts. A hang up from the Victorian era.
    We try to use the correct terms for body parts with our kids- because we have been educated that it is important to do so. Not everyone has been informed.
    Just seems to have degenerated into a bashing of religious people. Not so comfortable with that.

  13. Lori says:

    Once upon a time, Winston Churchill was dining in fine company, and when asked what piece of chicken he wanted, he requested a breast. A lady there upbraided him, saying, “Mr. Churchill, in polite society we ask for white meat or dark.”

    The next day Churchill sent her a corsage, instructing the lady to affix it to her “white meat.”

    Gotta love the British, eh, DASS?

  14. Ronnie Fein says:

    I’m with you and the sharpie. All this seems like nonsense to me.

  15. Vanessa says:

    Really? I mean, really? Some serious WTFery is happening within our tribe. When you posted the “b-word” post earlier this week, I thought you meant “bitch”. Silly me. It’s taken til today for me to get around to reading it, and all I can thing is W.T.F?

  16. rebecca says:

    haha. so true! when i moved to bk, everyone calls it “cutlets” or “shnitzel”. it isn’t shnitzel unless its fried up! where i come from we call it breasts.

  17. Naomi says:

    well at least this discussion has served a purpose for me. I got a good healthy laugh out of the comments.

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