Mornings with kids

I recently had a conversation with an older gentleman who is a school teacher who lives in my apartment building. He sometimes sees my boys in the elevator when they leave for school. He makes a point to search me out to tell me something they did for him that was considerate, even if it was just saying a chirpy “Good Morning” to him.

He was telling me that some of his elementary students don’t see their parents in the morning. That the children get themselves up out of bed, pack their lunch, and eat breakfast (or don’t), while the parents are still asleep. They get themselves ready and are responsible for getting themselves to the bus / to school on time.

I am not the type of mother that fusses around her kids in the morning. I am not a morning person and the biggest mug of coffee will still not make me that way. But however, I do think it’s an important part of a child’s morning to be sent off to school with a full belly and a warm hug and a kiss. I don’t hover. I can’t abide hoveration and I think the kids would soon complain. They complain enough about the kissing! Euw Ima!! But I am around and there for them. I cannot understand kids as young as nine letting themselves out of the house for school without a parent at the door seeing him off.

What are your thoughts?

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  1. frumgoth says:

    I strongly agree. I think it is so important for me be here to make sure that my daughter, who is nine, has breakfast, packs a snack, has her notebooks, etc, and gets to school on time. Not to mention the overall love and emotional support that I try to provide (maybe not as successfully in the morning, but as you said, coffee!)

    I work in the public school system and can say that most of the students do have a parent helping them get ready and even accompanying them to school. Unfortunately though, there are some situations in which parents are having trouble coping, health problems, family crisis, etc. and they are not awake to help their young children. These kids have the option of having breakfast at school, and the staff tries to be supportive and nurturing. Still, it must be so difficult for these kids who don’t have that parental support.

  2. RubyV says:

    I’m up with The Pixie in the mornings, or my hubs is. But, while one of the adults packs her lunch, we are teaching her how to handle her own breakfast (pour cereal and soy milk). Last week, we started teaching her to wait by the front door for the bus by herself (it’s indoors with a view of the bus).

    Pixie is 6. Our goal is to find a blend of nurturing with self sufficiency. Since I have to be off to school myself soon after her, and hubs is often out of town for work, we’ve started trying to find a way that makes morning less mad, and more efficient. However, every morning starts with a 15 min snuggle fest in my bed while we hit the snooze button before we haul out.

    I imagine that many of those kids he mentioned may have parents with off hours, or ill, etc.

    • HSaboMilner says:

      i love those morning snuggles. My two oldest are too old apparently, but the two younger ones still snuggle. I think it gets their day off to a good start.

      self sufficiency is great, something that I encourage in my boys, but they need a parent around.

      Even my 7 year old gets his own breakfast – when its oatmeal I help him with hot water, they all pack their own lunches but I am around to supervise (they call supervising nagging, but it so isn’t that way) and approve.

  3. Lady Lock and Load says:

    Enjoy the boys, kids grow up so fast. I think my kids appreciated that I was there for them in the mornings and when they came home from school. I remember my own mother making tea with milk for me on cold winter mornings (she’s european, so it was tea with MILK).

  4. mokumalef says:

    hmmm – I’m European too, but only on that island nation to the west of my little European corner would the strange idea have arisen to add milk to perfectly fine dark tea. Just ask the Chinese, who invented it.

  5. I don’t think that’s something they ever outgrow. Even my big boy, who leaves the house really early, appreciates that I’m up and around when he’s getting ready. He doesn’t need me to do anything, but it’s hard to get up and leave the house when you’re the only one up and it’s still dark out.

  6. mrsjessica says:

    My mom used to see me off in the mornings, even when she wasn’t driving me to school. She’d mostly be in her PJs, but who could blme her? And she made me breakfast all through high school (she was WAY more of a morning person than I am!)

    I can’t imagine not being awake in the morning, unless there was something else going on. Even, if I can manage it, making breakfast. I knew how to do it, but it was so great to have someone do it for me, since I certainly wasn’t up to snuggling in the mornings!

  7. Heather says:

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  8. My mother REALLY, REALLY was not a morning person. I got my sisters and myself together. And when I was under 10, I could except that she’d be home in the afternoon making us some warm porridge or a payaya milkshake.

  9. Z! says:

    I think that one of the main reasons my mom become a ‘stay at home mom’ was due to the fact that she and my uncle were latchkey kids.

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